I can't read Jane Austen.
Yes, I'm a woman who loves to read, but I pretty much dislike Jane Austen.
It's a hard burden to bear. While all the women around me are making references to some Jane Austen novel, I just smile and nod like I know what they are talking about.
While women are gushing about how they LOVE Pride & Prejudice, I'm silent.
I really, really try to like Jane Austen. Every year or so, I pick up Pride & Prejudice and start reading. It doesn't last long.
Maybe the problem lies in the fact that I really just want to read Pride & Prejudice so I can read Pride & Prejudice & Zombies and fully appreciate it.
I've only confessed my distaste of Jane Austen to a few friends. Usually, it's because I'll have the impression that she doesn't like Jane Austen either. I can tell this friend doesn't get the Jane Austen reference either. Or this friend doesn't seem to have the patience needed to get through a Jane Austen novel (much like myself). So I'll quietly whisper during a conversation about books, "I hate Jane Austen."
The friend will sigh in relief and agree.
Then I almost always say, "That's why we're friends."
I do have one Jane Austen-appreciator-friend that I've shared my disdain. She assures me that Jane Austen is worth reading, and told me that it's quite funny after you read it once or twice.
You mean I have to read it twice?!?
So my Jane Austen-appreciator-friend got Haddie a Jane Austen book. And I did read this one.
Maybe one day I'll read the real novel.
Especially if Haddie grows up to like Jane Austen.